Hollywood Mew Mew
by SonicXMinagirl
Summary: A Mew Mew Power parody. Zoey Hanson lived a charmed life. A pretty, popular, and rich girl who lives near Hollywood. Her world gets turned upside when she gets injected with Wildcat genes. Now Zoey must protect Hollywood against aliens and polution, not that she cares about any of the crap. No, Zoey would much rather hook up with super hot alien, Dren. One problem. He might be gay!
1. Chapter 1

A.N. Hello everyone :) So I know I probably _shouldn't _be starting up a new story but…Well here I am! Before I begin, I have a few things I need to mention….first, some characters may come off as OOC due to the whole Hollywood thing. Keep in mind that most people on that side of the country are very trend and fashion conscious, they are heavily influenced by the media and all those air brushed movie stars. (Or so I've heard) Plus most of these people have quite a bit of money, so naturally some of the girls will be spoiled rotten. Second, this is a parody. I am making fun of the English dub. This means that Dren will be criticized for his gay voice. If you are one of those people who gets easily offended by gay jokes, I suggest you hit the back button now. And third, even though this is a parody, I still want it to at least have some plot and plenty of drama alongside the humor. Hope you enjoy :)

-O-

_Zoey Hanson gasped for air and slapped a manicured hand over her mouth and nose. There was a thick, black smog surrounding the area, making it nearly impossible for her to breathe. The teenage girl fell to her knees and tears began to stream down her face from coughing. She tried to scream, but only a choking gasp escaped from her glossed lips. Zoey flinched when she felt her hand brush up against something. She fell over gasping, when she realized it was a body. Ew! It better not have been a dead one! _

_The red head whimpered when she heard a strange laugh. It was a horrible and ugly cackle that sounded like a belonged to an older lady with a deeper voice. How totally and completely horrifying! Zoey's perfectly made up, chocolate brown eyes widened when she saw a tall figure approaching her, it had golden, snake-like that glowed brightly in the black fog._

Zoey woke up with a loud gasp. Chills skipped down her spine as she looked around her white themed room with pink accents while gasping for air. That felt too real. The red head slowly sat up, grabbing her white iphone with the hot pink rhinestones on the back and pressed the on button at the top. The black screen flashed to life revealing a picture of Zoey and her two best friends Megan and Mimi. The numbers on the screen revealed that it was ten fifty-seven.

"TEN FIFTY-SEVEN!?" Zoey gasped as she tumbled out of the bed, landing on her soft carpet. "Ow!" She moaned, before quickly standing back up. She didn't have time to deal with pain. Today she and her friends had hair appointments scheduled at eleven thirty. There was no time to waste!

Zoey quickly ripped off her Victoria's Secret: PINK pajamas, and grabbed the outfit she had planned the night before out of her closet. A cream colored sweater dress with a brown scarf wrapped around the waist as a belt with short, brown furry boots. Once she had the curve hugging dress on, Zoey began to put on her makeup. She smiled when she saw that her zit cream had worked perfectly, not that it was much of a surprise. They didn't sell zit cream for three hundred dollars a tube if it didn't work. The teenage girl fluffed up her ruby red hair and smiled at her perfect reflection in her huge vanity mirror one final time before strutting out the door.

Zoey rushed down the large stair case and made a break for the kitchen, hoping that she wouldn't run into her mother, who was upset at for due to texting at the dinner table the night before. She didn't even get what the big deal was? Her mom could be such a pain, her father was even worse!

"Zoey is that you?"

"I'm leaving bye!" The red head called out before running out of and slamming the front door. It looked like she'd have to skip breakfast today, but maybe it was for the better. Zoey had eaten a small bowl of strawberry ice cream the night before, and she could feel the fat building up on her thighs. She climbed into her car, ignoring the growls of protest her from her flat tummy, and drove off.

-O-

Megan and Mimi looked up from the hair magazines that they were intently staring at when they heard Zoey come into the hair salon. "Zoey!" Both girls squeaked as they hopped off of the couch they had been seated on and ran up to their friend.

"Thank goodness you're here Zoey! I was seriously getting worried 'cause I don't know what haircut to pick!" Mimi quickly said while tugging on Zoey's arm.

"Watch the sleeves!" The red head urged lightly pushing Mimi away then turned to look at Megan who had a blonde eyebrow raised.

"You slept in again didn't you?" Megan asked smirking.

Zoey rolled her eyes as the three teens walked back over to the small waiting area and sat on the couch. "What do you think?"

"Maybe if you didn't go to bed so late…" The blonde began to scold only for Zoey to stick out her tongue at her.

"So what kind of haircut are you getting Zoey?" Mimi asked, changing the subject.

"Well…" Zoey flipped her short red hair a bit as she talked. "I was just going to get a slight trim, I like my hair the way it is." She smiled with satisfaction. It was straight, glossy and had the most wonderful ruby red color to it. "Have you girls decided what you're going to do yet?" She nonchalantly asked while inspecting her French manicure nails. Both girls shook their heads no. Zoey looked down at her waxed legs and smiled, this is exactly what she had been hoping for. "Megan, I think you should leave your length the same, but get fluffy layers." She suggested while slightly fingering Megan's golden blonde hair.

"What about me?" Mimi asked worriedly.

"Don't worry Mimi!" Zoey smiled and put an arm around the brunette. "I haven't forgotten you!" She said. She most certainly hadn't forgotten when her so-called friend bought the last of the exact color of lip tint that she had been dying to get her hands on during their last shopping trip, but the red head wasn't bitter. She had the perfect way to get even. "Mimi," She began trying to sound as sweet and innocent as possible. "A pixie cut would look absolutely _amazing_ on you!"

"A-a pixie cut…?" The brunette slowly asked while fingering her long brown hair. "But it isn't that really short?"

"Duh Mimi!" Zoey rolled her eyes but then smiled. "You have the perfect face shape for it!" She lied. "Right Megan?"

Zoey stared expectantly at the blonde, who at first looked baffled, but then covered it up with a laugh. "Uh…yeah!" She finally agreed, though she didn't sound completely sure.

"Zoey Hanson!"

The three teens looked up when they heard the receptionist call out Zoey's name. "Then it's settled!" The red head turned back to her friends and smiled at a nervous looking Mimi before scurrying over to where her usual stylist was.

-O-

Zoey inspected some of the salon's hair products as she waited for Megan and Mimi. As usual her ruby red hair had been washed, conditioned, trimmed, and blow dried to perfection. It now shined and bounced like the models in the Pantene commercials. Of course, those were false advertisement since Pantene products were just a bunch of cheap crap that ruined hair. She didn't even buy hair products from normal stores anymore.

"ZOEEEEY!"

The red head smiled at the sound of Mimi wailing, but put on an innocent face before turning. The brunette's hair was extremely short, it was actually quite a shock compared to the long length it had previously been. Mimi's large grey eyes were spilling with tears and she looked absolutely horrified. "This is awful!" She whimpered. "I look like a freakin' lesbian!"

"Oh no you don't!" Zoey lied as she lightly hugged her friend, and smirked. This totally served Mimi right, but Zoey wasn't completely heartless. She knew Mimi would survive, she'd eventually get used to her short hair. Plus the haircut didn't actually look super bad, even if it did make her friend look like a lesbian…

"Mimi, what's wrong?" Megan asked as she came up next to the two girls, her short, blonde hair looked shiny, fluffy and voluptuous.

"My hair!" Mimi whimpered and went to bury her face into Zoey's dress, only for the red head to pull away. Zoey didn't want makeup, snot and tears all over her _cream colored_ dress.

"You look fine Mimi! It makes you look like Anne Hathaway" Zoey quickly added and pretended to inspect a hair product when Megan gave her a crazy look. This was probably because the other day, the two had been discussing how much they hate the actresses' new hairdo.

"Y-you think so…?" Mimi asked hopefully.

"Totally!" Zoey smiled and giggled when Megan hugged both of the girls. None of them seemed to notice a blond guy intently watching them.

Elliot Grant sat in the comfortable salon chair, pretending to read a fashion magazine, but was instead staring at the group of girls that were hugging and giggling. He was especially interested in the one with red hair. She struck him as a leader. He was especially fond of the way she had cheered up her friend so easily. Elliot looked away from the red head when he saw his stylist walk up.

"Oh Elliot!" The young woman cooed. "Did you get go tanning? It looks great!"

"Well to tell you the truth, I'm not too fond of tanning beds, but my skin was just getting so pasty. I had to!" Elliot smiled up at his stylist.

The young woman laughed as she grabbed a bowl and some squirt tubes. "So what will it be for you today?"

"I think I want to go a lighter blond. I was thinking of highlights, but I'll save it for next time." Elliot said as he ran a hand through his hair. He was quite aware that most guys his age did not color their hair, but he wasn't like most guys. "Say Alison,"

"Yes?" Alison asked as she grabbed some foil.

"You see that red head over there?" Elliot asked as he pointed to the three girls. "What's her name."

"Oh that's Zoey Hanson. She's a regular here."

"Zoey…Hanson…" Elliot smiled as he looked down at his magazine. Zoey would be the perfect leader for his group of super sexy Mew Mew money makers/super heroes. Having these girls at his disposal was one of the perks of being a super rich high school student. He couldn't wait to start experimenting on her.

The blond would eventually realize that this was a huge mistake.

-O-

A.N. I'm not sure how often I'll update this yet, I was sort of hoping to finish Strawberry Bride in the near future.


	2. Chapter 2 Sexkitten

A.N. Wow nine reviews on the first chapter! I think that's a new record for me. I'm very glad that you liked this so much, I was actually a little nervous to see the reviews ^_^

-O-

"Hey Zoey, I really need some lip gloss. Can I use yours?"

Zoey Hanson nodded at the blonde girl sitting next to her, and handed Megan her purse. "Just don't use my strawberry Victoria's Secret one."

"Yeah, yeah." Megan smiled and rolled her eyes before opening and digging through the expensive purse. She stopped and made a funny face when she pulled out a plastic baggy full of pills. "Really Zoey?"

"Relax! There only diet pills" The red head explained with a quick eye roll.

"Since when do you take diet pills?"

"I just started actually. I'm really starting to get fat!" Zoey complained and gave the almost non-existant pooch on her belly a squeeze.

Megan opened her mouth to comment, but was interrupted when Mimi walked up and sat in the desk behind Megan's. "Hey." She greeted her two friends with a smile.

"Oh Mimi! Did you get a haircut?"

All three girls turned to look at the girl who was seated behind Zoey and next to Mimi, her name was Klarissa.

"No duh!" Megan said while looking at an unimpressed Zoey who simply rolled her chocolate brown eyes.

"Well I think the short hair really looks good on you. Not everyone can pull that off." Klarissa told Mimi, ignoring Zoey and Megan.

"Thanks." Mimi smiled, and her face flushed a bit as she self-consciously patted her short, brown hair. "I still think it looks like lesbian hair."

Klarissa laughed loudly at that. Zoey and Megan frowned at each other and shook their heads. Klarissa was such a loser. "That's funny, but don't forget-" Klarissa leaned in closer to the three girls as if she was about to spill a major secret. Being one who always enjoyed gossip, Zoey leaned in and Megan followed suit. "Only fat, ugly girls are lesbos!"

Megan and Mimi snickered a bit at this, while Zoey smirked. Oh! So does your girlfriend go to school here? Do I know her?" The red head innocently asked. Megan cracked up at that, while Mimi tried to hold back her laugh, but failed miserably. Zoey smirked in satisfaction at how Klarissa's face turned bright red, and she looked absolutely horrified. Before anything else could be said, the teacher walked in and began class.

Zoey constantly looked down at her phone to check the time. She could not wait for class to be over. The teacher was talking about red endangered species or something like that. He was currently talking about a black wildcat that Zoey couldn't care less about. Heck, she didn't care about any of the animals that were discussed. What was the point? They were going to become extinct anyways, so why waste all that time and money on them? She was brought out of her thoughts when she heard several people sitting around gathering their belongings.

That meant only one thing.

Class was almost over!

"Okay, okay, just let me say one thing before you all run out on me." The teacher sighed. "I'm going to put all of you in groups of two. I want the two of you to do a research paper on one of the red data animals" He passed out an instruction paper that had all the specific details. Zoey rubbed her glossed lips together when the teacher began to read off the pairings. She was hoping to get someone good.

Several names were called. Megan and Mimi grinned at each other when they were paired together. Zoey frowned a bit. If those two were together, then who would she be with? A cute guy wouldn't be so bad.

"Zoey Hanson, and Brittany Bary."

Zoey's head shot up. He so did not just pair her with… The red head's fears were confirmed when she heard Megan and Mimi's hushed whisper. Brittany, who was sitting towards the front of the classroom turned around to glance at Zoey. She had long, blonde hair, and mahogany eyes. She flashed a small smile. The red head pretended she didn't notice.

Once the bell rang and students began to scurry out of the classroom, Brittany got up and walked up over to Zoey's desk. "So maybe we could meet at the library this weekend?" The blonde asked with a kind smile hopeful smile.

"Sure whatever." Zoey quickly said with a halfhearted shrug. She quickly strutted away before anymore could be said.

-O-

Zoey inspected her appearance in the mirror of the library's bathroom. Today was Saturday. The dreaded day when she was supposed to work on that stupid paper, with an even stupider Brittany. Even though she didn't want to be there at all, Zoey still wanted to look awesome so Brittany would feel like the inferior being that she was. To do this, the red head wore a grey sweater that made her boobs look big and her tummy flat with a short, lavender colored skirt with grey tights and high heeled leather boots. Her short, ruby hair still looked freshly cut, and her makeup was perfect. Zoey Hanson was ready! "I rule." She whispered to her reflection. With that, she strutted out of the bathroom in search of the very unfashionable blonde. Little did she know that there was a very fashionable blond watching her.

Elliot ducked behind a book case (ninja style) before Zoey could see him. He pulled a small walkie-talkie out of the pocket of his tight, skinny jeans and put it to his mouth. "BishieboyIII, this is Sexybuns do you read me?"

"Roger!" A calm sounding male voice answered.

"Excellent, I have Sexkitten in sight. I repeat I have Sexkitten in sight."

"Copy that!" The voice excitedly answered. It was pretty clear that Elliot and his partner in crime were quite into this.

"BishieboyIII, did you bring the…" Elliot paused to look around, when he saw the coast was clear he brought the communication device even closer to his lips and whispered. "g-u-n?"

"Yes, yes I did. It's in my man purse."

"Good. Meet in the children's fiction A through D section" Elliot ordered. "Sexybuns out!"

After a few seconds of looking around, Zoey located Brittany. She couldn't help but smirk at the sight of the blonde. Her long hair looked pretty flat and frizzy, and she was only wearing a casual long sleeve shirt with jeans that were probably very unflattering. Brittany stood up, putting down the book she was reading to greet Zoey, but before she could say anything, Zoey tripped. With a small shriek the red head crashed onto the carpeted floor. She felt her blood boil when she heard Brittany giggle.

"Are you okay?" The blonde asked and held out her hand to help Zoey up.

Zoey ignored it and got up on her own. "I'm fine." She mumbled.

"Maybe you shouldn't wear such high heels." Brittany pointed to Zoey's boots.

"Maybe you should drop it!" Zoey snapped and took a seat at the table that Brittany had been at. She looked around to see if there were any of those annoying, old hag, library workers lurking around. When she saw that the coast was clear, she pulled out a strawberry slimfast from her purse.

The red head pretty much tuned Brittany out, and let her do all of the work. Zoey was much too busy texting Megan.

**Meg: Having fun with boobless Brit?**

**Zoey: LOL! I'm havin the time of my life not! Her outfit burns meh eyes! *.***

**Meg: An over sized sweatshirt and unflattering jeans?**

**Zoey: Ur right on the jeans, but she's wearing just a plain ol ugly shirt! Don't even get me started on her shoes… -_-**

**Meg: Make sure to drink plenty of OJ afterwards, I would hate for you to catch Brittany's loser XD**

"Zoey…Zoey!"

Zoey boredly looked up at Brittany. "What?"

"We really need to get going on this, Zoe…" Brittany answered. It was obvious that she was trying really hard to hide her frustration.

Zoey slammed her phone onto the table so that Brittany would be able to see Megan's last message if she looked down. "I don't even let my friends call me that, so what makes you think I'd let _you_?" She venomously hissed.

Brittany looked down to avoid the hateful brown eyes glaring at her, but then quickly looked back up. Her face flushed red and she almost look like she was about to cry. "I don't get it Zoey. What happened to us?"

Zoey rolled her eyes. The two had been good friends in junior high…best friends actually.

"What did I do to make you hate me?" Brittany quietly (since they were in a library) demanded.

The red head really didn't feel like explaining how the two girls began to subtly drift apart. Zoey became interested in fashion and popularity, while all Brittany wanted to do was be nice to people and do her school work. If she wanted to get somewhere in her high school career, sacrifices had to made.

Brittany was the sacrificial lamb.

"Zoey-"

"Look!" The red head abruptly stood, causing her slimfast to spill all over Brittany and some of the books, not that she cared for either. "I don't like you, end of story! Now I'm going to demand that Mr. Whatever-his-name-is gives me a better partner!" Zoey turned and stormed off, unfortunately Brittany chased after her.

"Zoey wait. Zoey!"

Zoey quickened her pace, while trying to tune out Brittany's annoying voice. She had almost succeeded when suddenly the girl chasing after her shrieked. Zoey turned and was a bit surprised to see Brittany fall to the floor as if she had gotten pushed down. She didn't really get a chance to react to this though, because suddenly a bright flash of red flooded her vision.

"BishieboyIII we got Sexkitten. I repeat, we got Sexkitten."

That was the last thing Zoey heard before the world went black.

-O-

A.N. Alright, for those of you wondering where Mark is, he's going to be in the story, but I wanted to change things up a bit. I have special plans for him actually ;) In case you didn't notice Brittany is NOT an OC! Also this semester is going to be pretty crazy for me. (I'm in a junior level writing class in which I will have to eventually give an HOUR long speech) So updates on all my stories will most likely slow down -_- sorry guys…I'll try my best not to leave you hanging for too long!


	3. Chapter 3 Mewamorphasis

A.N. Hi all! :D I have returned! Anyways here is the next chapter! Yay!

-O-

Zoey's chocolate brown eyes fluttered opened, she had no memory of the previous events, but she sort of felt that something very important had been cut from her subconscious. "Omigosh!" She screeched and sat up when she saw Brittany and some old lady staring down at her. She mentally screeched again when she realized that she was on the dirty floor. She really hoped they didn't drag her in there.

"Thank goodness you're okay." The old lady said. Brittany smiled and nodded, which annoyed Zoey, but at least the big stain on blonde's shirt made her feel better. Wait, didn't she spill her slimfast on Brittany? Yeah, that made her feel a lot whole better!

"So like what happened to me?" The red head asked as she stood up.

"You seem to have fainted dear." The librarian said. Brittany looked down. Zoey squinted her eyes. She didn't remember fainting…the only thing she remembered was Brittany falling.

"Oh, well I'd better go." Zoey said and quickly went to make her escape. This whole day was getting to be too awkward for her. The red head quickened her pace when she heard Brittany call out. The blonde was the last person she wanted to talk to especially since something weird had just happened.

-O-

"Ugh! Zoey what is this? It smells like crap!"

The red head forced her heavy eyelids open and looked up to see Megan sniffing the grilled chicken that the red head had brought for lunch. Mimi giggled before taking a dainty little bite from her banana.

"It's Lean Cuisine or one of those other diet food things." Zoey tiredly mumbled. To be honest she didn't really remember.

Mimi frowned and waved her hand in front of her tired friend's face. "Why are you so tired? I thought you were a morning person."

"Me too!" Zoey yawned. There was really no reason to be tired. She had gone to bed early the night before. Heck, she even slept through all her morning classes.

"Maybe you should eat something." Megan suggested.

With her head still on the table, Zoey blindly reached and grabbed the first thing she could find and stuffed it into her mouth. "Mmm!" It tasted really _really_ good! The red head sat up and continued to eat.

"So how was your "study date" with Britt-nay?" Megan asked with a smirk.

"Yeah." Mimi nodded and leaned closer.

Zoey rolled her eyes and swallowed her bite of food. "Lame, she was all like _why won't you be my friend?_ And _blah blah blah boo hoo I'm a loser!_" She mocked in a baby voice, causing her friends to giggle and snicker. "And then you'd never believe what happened next!" Zoey grabbed another bite of food as she mentally prepared to tell her friends about the weird fainting incident.

For some reason Mimi began to giggle and nudged Megan. The blonde girl's eyes bug out then she scowled. "Um Zoey…"

"Yeah?" The red head asked between bites of the food.

"You're eating all of my spicy tuna rolls!"

"Huh?" Zoey blinked and looked down. Her diet chicken hadn't even been touched, while almost all of Megan's California rolls were almost gone. What the heck? She didn't even like seafood!

"Thanks a lot." Megan muttered and popped one of the few remaining rolls into her mouth.

"Well so-rry! I didn't _nyaow_!" Zoey snapped and then shut her mouth. That had come out really weird luckily her friends didn't seem to notice. "But I didn't realize that California rolls tasted so _meowvelous!_"

This time Megan and Mimi exchanged a glance. "And I don't think they're very fattening!" Mimi added with an awkward giggle.

For some reason hearing this really excited Zoey. "_Purrrr-fect!_" She purred and then quickly covered her mouth. Everything was coming out wrong!

Mimi bit her lip and Megan frowned. "Zoey, is everything okay?"

"Yeah you're like acting kind of weird…"

"I…uh…" The red head frantically looked all around the cafeteria. She didn't want her best friends to start thinking that she was a loser. Or even worse. What if they thought she caught Brittany's loser-itus? "You're sushi!" She suddenly said and looked at Megan. "I- uh I think it's spoiled!" She said and slapped a manicured hand over her mouth and got up.

"It's not real sushi though." Megan quietly said before inspecting the pieces she hadn't eaten.

As soon as the red head was far enough away from her friends' table, she removed her hand from her mouth and regained her confident composer. Everyone at all the other tables looked up at her in awe and admiration, not that it was a surprise. Zoey and her friends were the current it girls, and she intended to defend that title for long as she could. She smiled at certain people and ignored others. She stuck her nose in the air when she saw that Brittany's table was coming up. Today the blonde girl was actually wearing a decent outfit. A cute caramel sweater with matching boots and okay looking jeans. Too bad the color palette did nothing for her. The other girl at the table was a short haired girl named Ruth, she wore huge bows in her hair and other little kid stuff, which made her even more loser-ish than Brittany.

The two girl stared at Zoey when she passed by. Brittany started to get up which caused the red head to quicken her pace. Why did Brittany have to be such a wannabe stalker?

"Zoey!" The blonde girl called out as soon as they got to the empty hallway. She frowned when Zoey didn't respond. "Zoey!"

Still no response.

"Stop ignoring me!"

This continued until the two girls got outside. Growing weary of hearing her name being constantly repeated, Zoey sighed loudly and turned. "What?" She growled.

"Well…I-I wanted to talk about yesterday." Brittany quietly answered and tried to approach the red head.

Zoey in turn, backed away and glared. "I already told you-!"

"No!" The other girl quickly shook her head, causing her long blonde hair to swing around. It looked nothing like a Pantene commercial. "I wanted to talk about what happened after that. When you fainted."

Zoey continued to back away, completely unaware of the railing and drop behind her. "What about it? Nothing happened!" She lied. Okay maybe something did happen, it would explain all the weird things that had been happening. Not that she'd even discuss it with Brittany. The red head kept moving backwards.

"Zoey!" Brittany gasped. "You're going to-!"

Zoey gasped when her butt crashed into the railing, and screamed when it gave way and caused her to flip. A strange feeling flooded her system when her body flipped again. Suddenly she found herself on her feet, safely on the pavement below. It had all happened so fast, but she was alive and not hurt at all. Zoey gasped in relief as her racing heart slowed. That was so weird!

"Are you okay!?"

The red head looked up to see Brittany staring down with her. The blonde's mahogany eyes were wide. For some reason this made Zoey's face heat up. She quickly turned away with a growl and walked off.

"Zoey!"

The red head kept on walking. In fact she walked right off the school's property. Anyone going through a crisis shouldn't be expected to just sit around. Zoey had some things she needed to figure out. For starters what the heck was going on with her body? This was way worse than the time she had first gotten PMS. For starters she couldn't seem to get enough sleep. True, she normally had problems waking up in the morning, but that was only because she'd stay up late to text so she could gossip with her friends. It wasn't her fault that the people in her school were so fun to talk about.

And then there was the fish thing. Ever since Zoey had been a little girl she had always hated seafood. The fishy smell made her feel queasy and didn't the fish still have poop in its body (or was that just shrimp?) Either way fish grossed her out…until today. Those spicy tuna rolls tasted heavenly. Zoey licked her lips, but then bit her tongue as if to rebuke it.

The red head turned onto a path that lead to a cute little park. The strangest and most disturbing thing that had happened to her was falling. No matter how much she tried to hide it, Zoey was a natural klutz- she hated it! But because of her clumsiness she should have totally killed herself falling, but no she landed on her feet and was perfectly fine. "It's like I'm a ca-!"

"Zoey…Zoey?"

Zoey's eyes widened. Really? Brittany had followed her all the way here!? She grit her teeth in annoyance and started to power walk. That girl was seriously getting on her last nerve. The red head stopped short when that feeling she had when falling came back. A chill ran up her spine as she looked around the trail. Something in the back of her head told her something bad was about to happen, and without thinking about it her legs began to move once again.

"Where are you Zoey…"

The red head turned was just about to get off the path and into the park, but stopped when she saw Brittany and hid behind a nearby tree. The blonde girl was looking around, probably for her. The weird part was that there was fog around her. It was then that Zoey thought of something. All of the strange things happening…it was all Brittany's fault! It had to be. Stupid witch! Stupid bi-!

A large shadow began to form behind Brittany. She was too busy looking around to even notice the long, flesh colored appendage that was slithering towards her. With a loud smacking sound she was sent flying. Zoey screamed when Brittany crashed into a tree and lifelessly fell to the ground. She instantly realized that this was a mistake when the shadow turned and began to get closer. The fog lifted a bit revealing a giant and mutated looking rat. Zoey gasped and quickly began to back into a nearby tree. She squeezed her eyes shut when the monster lifted its arm to strike her.

When she opened them she found herself in the arms of an older blond that was wearing very tight clothes. "Um no!" She sneered, forgetting her previous danger and pushing herself off of him. She screeched when fell back. They were in a tree! When the heck did that happen? "WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON HERE!?" She screamed in agitation.

The blond grinned down at her then ran a hand through his dyed hair. "The name's Elliot Grant. I am a super rich high school student!"

"Yeah well I'm Zoey Hanson, a pretty and popular high school student who DOESN'T CARE!" She hissed while trying to unlatch her nails from the branch. It seemed that had gotten stuck when she fell.

Elliot didn't seem to mind, in fact he smirked. "Someone seems to be in a _catty_ mood." He said and then burst into hysterics. Zoey kept trying to free her nails. "Speaking of which, I'm going to need you to defeat that monster." He casually told her.

"Scuse me?" Zoey asked once her nails were unlatched.

"Ahhhh~ Ahhhhh~ Ahhhhhhhhhhh~"

The red head's jaw dropped when Elliot sang out like the chick from Enchanted. Suddenly with a poof, a little pink puffball appeared and sang the same tune. Zoey thought it was ugly. The puffball flew close to the weird blond and spit something into his hand.

"Thank you." Elliot said and then showed Zoey that the spit out item was a golden pendant. He then pushed it into her lips.

"Hey!"

"Power pendant!" He yelled out in a mock feminine voice. "Mewamorpasis!" He then grabbed and lifted Zoey then started to do this strange dance with her.

The red head screamed and struggled as her clothes began to magically dissolve. Elliot moved his and pressed the pendant into her lower thigh. Was she being raped!? Suddenly he lifted her arms and spun her as a pink ribbon wrapped itself around her nude body. The red head was slightly relieved when she realized she was no longer naked, but gasped when Elliot lifted her butt and then her leg straight up.

"Ow! OW! OWWWWW!" She screeched in terror and pain.

Suddenly he pushed it back down and started to spin with her again. The dizzy girl fell from the tree and barely managed to land on her feet. She looked down at her outfit , but didn't have time to comment on how desperate and horny it made her look because the rat monster began to attack her again. Without realizing it, Zoey leapt out of the way and on top of one of those wooden park shelter things. She turned to Elliot. "Okay…like what the heck!" She yelled.

The blond guy grinned at her. "Mew Zoey is ready for action!" He gave her thumbs up.

"Um am not! And what's a Mew, and how do you know my name!? What the heck is going on!?"

"I'll explain it after you kill the monster!" Elliot told her before grabbing hold of the ugly puff ball and petting it.

Zoey sighed. "Fine." If she didn't get answers, it was going to stress her out. Stress makes people fat and ugly so- "You stupid rat! You're species invented the ring-a-round-a-rosy plague…I think…?" Zoey shook her head she was stunned when she realized her hair was now pink, but she had to focus. "Mew Mew style! Mew Mew class! All you bad-guys can kiss my *ss!" She yelled.

-O-

A.N. Well I'm sorry about stopping here…but…someone special will make an appearance next chapter ;D That should make up for it right? Hope you enjoyed! :)


	4. Chapter 4 Twilight: Hollywood Style

A.N. EVERYONE! AHHHHHH! It's been too long! *gives everyone a hug* I'm so sorry! But school's been sooooo busy! T.T Will you forgive me since someone…_special_… is set to make an appearance? ;D Well regardless, here's the next chapter! Enjoy! X3

Ps. I still plan on continuing all my TMM WIP stories :) No matter how long it takes! Next on the schedule is CMM, but I still have some planning to do on that so I may skip ahead to SB. CKoC is a school assignment so that will be updated a day or two after turning it in.

-O-

"Mew Mew style, Mew Mew class, all you bad guys can kiss my *ss!" Zoey yelled and did a cat pose before stiffening and blinking in confusion. "Uhhh…ow!" She flinched when something hit her on the back of the head and landed behind her. It was a heart shaped ring with a bell in the center. Zoey picked it up and then scowled when Elliot-who had thrown it at her- began to clap.

"Yeah! You go girl!"

"What the heck did you to me!?" The pink haired teen screamed. It morphed into a horrified shriek when the monster rat thing charged her. Still screaming, Zoey leapt out of the way and landed on her bottom. "Agh! Go away!" She yelled when the monster continued coming after her. She squeezed her pink eyes shut and held the heart shaped thing in front of her for protection. She slowly opened her eyes when she heard the monster shriek and stood up when she saw it was rubbing its eyes.

"Now use your super move."

"Agh!" The cat girl spun around to see Elliot standing close by. When did he get there? She wanted to tell him he and his tight jeans were invading her personal bubble, but instead asked, "What the heck is a super move?"

"Allow me to show you." The older blond said. It was as if he was unaware of the giant monstrosity before them. He gracefully positioned himself behind her and grabbed onto the heart bell thing with both hands. "You need to do like me and grab it." He instructed.

"I guess." Zoey gave in, hoping this would somehow make the monster go away. Slowly she put both hands on below Elliot's large ones. "Like thiiis?" She yelped and began to squirm as the two began to float up and spin. "Waaaaah!"

As Zoey began to curse and flail, Elliot lifted the bell up. "Strawberry bell! Full power!" He yelled before striking a pose. Zoey was too busy spazzing out to even notice a light shoot out of the heart shaped object and hit the monster. She also didn't get to observe the monster shrink back into a mouse after having a flying jellyfish pop out of its chest. Zoey continued screaming and jerking until she and Elliot floated back down onto the ground.

"Huh?" The cat Mew blinked when she felt the ground under her. "Phew." Relief flooded her system and she was very tempted to kiss the ground, and would have too, if it wasn't for Elliot and Brittany being there. "Ohhh…Brittany…"

The blonde girl lay face down in the grass, her clothes were tattered. A small part of Zoey kind of hoped that she was dead, but the rest of her felt extremely guilty. If she hadn't run when Brittany was trying to talk then none of this would have ever happened. Then again if Brittany hadn't have been so annoying then Zoey wouldn't have had to run off, thus making it all the blonde's fault. …right? Seeing the Mew Mew's distressed and angry expression, Elliot became curious and followed her gaze. Without saying a word he quickly ran and knelt in front of the unconscious teen. After inspecting her, he looked up. "She's going to be okay."

Zoey had to bite her tongue to keep from simultaneously sighing in relief and cursing.

"I just need to get your friend some medical attention." The blond said as he stood with Brittany in his arms. Compared to Brittany's hair, Elliot's looked so fake along with his tan.

"She's not my friend…" Zoey mumbled, looking down at her boots. The faux fur made them look tacky. She looked back up and was surprised to see that Elliot and Brittany were gone. "Umm…" She looked around frantically. Did they seriously just leave her!? It was then that the cat girl realized something. "AM I STUCK LIKE THIS FOREVER!?"

"Who says that's a bad thing?"

Zoey turned at the sound of a feminine voice and nearly fell over. There was a person, floating! They were very slender and pale with huge ears and dark green hair styled in these weird looking pigtail things. "Who are you!?" She snapped, her heart thudding a mile a minute. The real question she wanted to ask was about its gender. It was honestly hard to tell. Was it a he, she, or ze?

The things smirked revealing a fang. "Name's Dren, Kitty-cat!" It said before landing in front of her. Strangely she found its slitted golden eyes to be very pretty. Okay so this thing was either a very attractive male, a butt ugly female, or a slightly disturbing hermaphrodite, and Zoey was determined to find out. She did the most sensible thing she could think of at the moment and stuck her gloved hands up the creature's loose shirt. Her glossed lips curved into a bit of a smile and her cheeks began to flush when instead of feeling boobs, she a firm chest. Yes! It was a guy.

"Mmm…you're pretty friendly. And to think I was going to like kill you for destroying my Chimera." Dren sighed in bliss, and went to grab Zoey's hips.

The cat girl spun away before flashing the elfin eared boy a coy smile. "Oh? You mean that rat thing? I was only trying to protect myself." She cooed in a flirty voice. For a guy with a weird voice, skin and hair, he was so adorable that Zoey couldn't help but flirt. Besides money could easily fix his flaws. Hire him a speech coach, plastic surgeon and hair stylist, throw him in a tanning bed, and buy him a new wardrobe then he'd be perfect for the already perfect red head. _Slow down, you barely know him!_ Zoey told herself.

"Well then I guess that's a good thing. It would totally be a waste for a cutie like you to die." Dren purred before floating closer.

Zoey's heart fluttered and she quickly fluffed up her pink waves. Maybe the only thing she'd change on him would be his voice. Then it would be just like Twilight, speaking of which. "Are you a vampire?"

Dren stopped and put a clawed finger up to his lips. Scratch that previous thought, she'd change his voice and clip his nails. After a few seconds of pondering he flashed a smirk her way and allowed his snake-like eyes to take in all of her curves. "Wouldn't you like to know…" He finally said.

"I would." Zoey smiled, wrapping her arms around her chest, hoping to make her cleavage look bigger.

"Tell you what kitty-cat. I'm in like such a bind for time, but we can get to know each other later." He winked.

The cat girl smiled. She liked the sound of that. "So….are we going to meet somewhere?" She asked and then frowned when Dren shook his head.

Dren smirked and bent down to whisper in Zoey's cat ear. "I'll find you…" He breathed causing the girl's cat ear to quiver in delight. Zoey smirked as a coy comment came to mind, but was surprised to see that Dren was gone.

"Omighosh…" She whispered in shaky giddy. She had a date with a vampire, how awesome was that! "Wait…" Zoey looked down to see she was still wearing her crazy cat outfit. "Wait! I DON'T KNOW HOW TO CHANGE BACK!"

-O-

A.N. Well that wraps up episode one :P Hope you enjoyed the changes! Now to force myself to sit through episode two of MMP -_- yay!


	5. Chapter 5 A World of Pure Imagination

A.N. Hey guys :) Well as of now it seems that I am ahead on my homework and such so I've been able to write quite a bit :D I figured I'd pump out a few updates before I get bombarded once again (which I fear will be after Spring Break and my B-day! XD) So let's do this thang!

-O-

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" Zoey Hanson- or rather- Mew Zoey screamed at whichever one of her parents were knocking on her bedroom.

"Zoey Hanson! It is dinner time, and we eat as a family." It was her mom.

"Yeah well…I'm not hungry!" The Mew Mew yelled and pushed her body against the door when she heard the sound of the lock being fiddled with. "Mooooom!" She whined to drown out the sound of her growling stomach. Truth be told she was starving, all that battling and flirting around with Drenward Cullen had made her hungry. But there was only one problem: Zoey was stuck as some crazy pink-haired hooker cat! She couldn't let her parents, or anyone for that matter, see her like that. That stupid Elliot and his fag pants! This was all his fault!

"Fine. Fine! Stay up here for all I care! On second thought stay here all night!" Mrs. Hanson yelled. Zoey sighed in relief when she heard the sound of her mom stomping down the stairs.

Once she was sure her mom wouldn't come back to bug her, the currently pink-haired teen went to her bed and plopped onto it. She was seriously screwed. Was she stuck as a slutty cat for the rest of her days?

Zoey turned when she heard a tapping noise on the window. Her heart skipped a beat. Maybe it was Dren come to get her! The cat Mew ran over and opened her curtain.

Nothing.

She frowned wondering if it was only her imagination, but flinched when a pebble bounced off the glass. "Huh?" Zoey looked down and scowled. Elliot was the one throwing the pebbles. With a growl, Zoey pushed opened the window. "What the heck is wrong with- OW!"

"My bad!" Elliot had thrown another pebble, which hit the Mew Mew right in the forehead, but unlike Goliath, she didn't fall.

"YOU FAGGOT!" Zoey screeched and gave the blond an obscene gesture.

"Hey! I find that quite offensive!" Elliot frowned.

"Yeah well, I find being stuck as an effin cat offensive!"

"You aren't a cat, you're a Mew Mew, super sexy defender of justice. Nya!"

"Y-you! Y-you're a sicko! Change me back! Or I'll- or I'll-!"

"Just think about changing back and it'll happen!"

"Yeah right!" Zoey spat out in disbelief, but was stunned when she looked down at herself. No more tacky, pink dress. She patted her silky straight hair. No cat ears. Her wide grin of relief was replaced by a snarl when she looked back down at a smug looking Elliot. "And you couldn't stick around to tell me that why?"

"Your friend was hurt. What did you expect me to do? Leave her for dead?"

"I wish…" Zoey huffed. "Is there a reason why you're here?" She asked, wanting him to hurry up and leave so that she could start looking into the speech therapist for Dren.

"Come down here." Elliot urged. "We need to talk about what happened."

"Or, we can just talk now…" The red-head shot back. Seriously who does this fake blond think he is?

The said blond's (probably fake) blue eyes narrowed. "I am not yelling classified information for the whole neighborhood to hear!"

"Okay." Zoey huffed. "Where did _you_ have in mind?"

"My Café of course! Café Mew Mew to be exact!"

"Mew Mew…? What kind of name is that?" Zoey mocked, but stopped when her stomach began to rumble once again. "Say…" Since her mom was being a jerkasauras and refused to feed her one and only daughter… "Will there be food there?" She asked hopefully.

"Hold your breath."

"Huh?"

"Make a wish."

"Elliot!"

"Count to three."

"YOU ARE NOT ANSWERING MY QUESTION!"

Elliot continued to ignore a very ticked off Zoey and began to sing. "Come with me. And you'll be. In a world of pure imagination-" He cut himself off when he saw Zoey reach up to close the window. "Yes! There will be food! Desserts to be exact!" He quickly said.

At the mention of food, the red-head's hateful glare instantly morphed into a cute smile. Yay! Looks like she wouldn't starve to death after all! "Alright, I'll go with you to your little café!" She consented. The first thing she was going to eat was something strawberry flavored. Yummy! In the back of her mind, Zoey knew she was going to regret consuming all that fat later, but she just told herself she'd just have to eat extra healthy for the rest of the week. "So…how do I get down?" She finally asked after a few minutes of fantasizing about the "world of pure imagination."

"Jump down of course." Elliot nonchalantly answered as if he was instructing Zoey walk out the door.

"Um what?" Zoey asked.

"Jump!" The older boy repeated himself, he blinked at the horrified face the redhead flashed him. "Come on! You're cat genes will ensure that you safely land on your feet."

"R-really?" Zoey asked. So that was why she landed like that after falling in front of Brittany the day before. If it worked once, then it would surely work again, right? "Okay, but if I hurt myself, I'm going to sue!" She threatened while swinging her legs (one at a time) out the window, and positioned her bootie so that she was sitting on the windowsill. Zoey took a deep breath in order to calm herself and squeezed her perfectly made up eyes shut. Before she could change her mind, the sixteen-year-old slipped off the window. Her stomach flip-flopped as she fell and her skirt flew up. Oh well, Elliot was probably gay so it didn't matter whether he saw anything or not. She landed on her feet- just like Elliot promised- and with that they were off to the Café via a red sports car.

Yep, the blond was most definitely gay.

Everyone knows that straight guys only drive manly cars.

-O-

Zoey baby barfed as she walked down the manicured walkway. Looming before her was a large, pink building. Not that she loathed the color in general. Pink was her favorite. It complimented her ruby red hair and brown eyes perfectly. Unfortunately, the color did anything but compliment buildings. In fact it made it look cheap and tacky.

"You like it?" Elliot asked, dashing ahead of her and stopping at the heart accented doors.

"You made this?" Zoey asked while flicking some lint off her shirt.

"Nope my partner did." Elliot said and then went to unlock the door.

"Partner eh?" Not much of a surprise there.

The older boy stopped himself halfway through opening the door in a very dramatic manner and scowled at Zoey. "He's my business partner."

"Suuuuure." The teenage girl pushed passed him and inspected the café's interior. It was cute, for a ten-year-old maybe. Zoey screeched when a man with questionably long brown hair popped out of nowhere.

"Hellooooo! You must be Miss Zoey Hanson!" He sang before grabbing Zoey's hand and planting a slobbering kiss on the top of her hand.

"Um ew…" She murmured and wiped the gay germs on her skirt. She looked up only to get a box thrown at her face. Luckily Zoey was able to catch it.

"Here! I made this especially for you! Please try it on! My name is Westley Coolridge the third Btw!"

"Omg…" Zoey muttered under her breath as she went to go find somewhere safe to change. This freak was even weirder than Elliot. And what was with his hair? So disgusting!

"Dressing room's the furthest door to your right." Elliot-who had just walked in- called out before taking a seat in one of the heart shaped chairs. As soon as Zoey was out of sight, the two boys proceeded to doing an overly complicated "secret handshake" This involved high-fiving each other and then fistbump, snap, snap, clap, backwards clap, clap, backwards clap, snap, and a few moves that would be ridiculously hard to describe.

By the time Zoey got back, the two were break dancing. The redhead smirked at the sight, but began to get freaked out when the shifted to ballroom dancing. She quickly cleared her throat to get their attention before she would be forced to witness something that was truly traumatizing. Elliot snapped to attention, and pushed Westley off him.

"Owie!" The older man yelped when he fell to the floor, but then gushed at the sight of Zoey. "Wow! You looke absolutely ah-mazing!"

"You really think so?" Zoey asked, pretending to be unsure. She just loved getting complimented.

"Please."

Both the brunette and redhead shot a disgusted looking Elliot a stunned look.

"Red is so not your color. It blends in way too much with your hair and makes you look pasty."

"'Scuse me?" Zoey growled. "At least I'm not wearing white pants after labor day!"

"Those rules are like so last year!"

"Yeah well…this place and you guys are like so last century! I don't need this. I'm outta here!" Zoey shot back and with a flip of her perfectly straight, shiny, silky, and totally unobtainable hair, she made a beeline for the door. Only to be attacked by Westly.

So after attempting to sway the cat girl into staying by convincing her she'll be popular…

They were shot down. Zoey Hanson was already popular thank you very much.

So they resorted to threatening her. Naturally, it was an offer our hero could not refuse. And so, a very terrified Zoey sat through and pretended to listen to an hour long presentation that talked about red data animals, girls with marks on their bodies, aliens, and other boring crap that went out one of her pierced ears and out the other. Besides, she was much too busy texting a potential speech therapist for Dren under the table. It seemed that before he would start any sessions with Dren, he wanted a recording of the vampire's voice.

Zoey had her mission. Instead of finding the next Mew girl for Elliot and Westley, she would find Dren and secretly record his voice.

-O-

A.N. So I decided to not go into detail with the final scene, because we all should know the whole Mew Mew lowdown by heart right? I hope this was okay. And next chapter should be fun :D Well this has been SonicXMinagirl and I am reminding you to wear panties over your leggings so they don't slip ^_^ (totally stole that from megafreak400- I'm such a fan of his!)


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